Why you sabotage & resist creating more ease in your business and life
I love it when things are easy.
LOVE it! However, here’s what I noticed: when things felt like they were TOO easy, doubts and fears crept up:
- Can it REALLY be THIS easy?!
- I bet it won’t last
- Won’t I get bored when everything is easy?
- Will I still learn and grow when things are easy?
- Does my work still have value when I don’t feel I have to work hard for it?
These are all conditioned beliefs.
We believe them because we repeatedly hear them. Not just me; you, too! We all know the expression ‘easy come, easy go’, for example.
But that expression makes NO sense. Why would something that comes to you with ease leave you?
We also learned that the harder we work for something, the more valuable it becomes. But why would something that comes to you with ease have LESS value? That doesn’t make ANY sense either. Yet it’s what most of us believe …
I see this in my clients, too. When they deeply enjoy their work, they’re in flow, and what they do feels easy, they start worrying: Am I delivering enough value? Am I doing enough? Am I doing the right things? It doesn’t feel like I’m working hard AND I love what I do, so is it okay to get paid (a lot) for it?
These doubts lead you to sabotaging yourself. You start to undercharge, for example. It feels wrong to receive a lot of money for easy work, so you keep your prices low. Or you start to overdeliver. When people pay you that much, you need to really WORK for it! (Or you do both: you undercharge and overdeliver.)
The result? You work harder than necessary and enjoy your work less.
You start to resent your clients because you don’t feel you get paid enough for the work you do. Business and life can be so much easier, but you don’t trust it. You can’t receive more ease-you sabotage it because you don’t trust business and life can (or should be) simple. But you keep wishing things were easier…
The truth is that business and life can be SO much easier than you think!
This begins with being honest about your desire for more ease, and clearing all beliefs that stand in the way of creating a relaxed, laid-back business and life.
This is a large part of the work I do with my private clients.
I help you see where, how, and why you sabotage yourself.And, more importantly, to stop doing that. This doesn’t have to be difficult. Once you’re aware of your self-sabotaging patterns and the stories and beliefs that drive this behavior, simple mindset tweaks are often all it takes to stop blocking yourself. You create more freedom, space and ease and feel SO much more relaxed!
You don’t have to force, push, or struggle to create the business and life you dream of.
Let me show you an easier way!
Originally published at https://brigittevantuijl.com on September 26, 2022.
Brigitte van Tuijl is a writer and master coach for women entrepreneurs. In the past two decades she helped thousands of women get clear on their true dream and make it real. Her clients have launched businesses globally, published their first books, doubled their incomes, and realized their most important goals and desires.
She’s the author of 7 books, amongst them ‘The Art of Divine Selfishness — transform your life, your business & the world by putting YOU first’ and her latest book ‘The Happy Hermit — how to thrive as an introvert entrepreneur.’