It’s not accountability you need. It’s this.


A magic word some people think will finally help them achieve their goals.

It’s something they look for in a coach, a program or a mastermind.

There’s nothing wrong with accountability, and it *can* potentially help you move forward faster.

But if you think you need it, or else you won’t get what you want? Stop. And think again.

Here’s why:

The reason you’re not reaching your goals (yet. or as fast as you’d like.) is NEVER because you have no one to hold you accountable or kick your ass.

It’s YOU who does not hold YOURSELF accountable.

And there are only 2 reasons you’re not doing that:

Reason #1

You’re not clear on what it is you’re trying to achieve.

It’s a vague desire that you can’t paint a picture of in your mind nor in your heart.

You don’t know what it looks like, what it feels like, or why it matters to you.

There’s no DEEP desire pulling your forward.

Because THAT’S where your drive, your motivation, your accountability, your stamina, your grit, TRULY comes from:

From the inside.

From your soul urging you, nudging you, luring you into something that excites you, that you love SO much, that nothing in the world can keep you from going for it.

If all you know is that you ‘want to grow your business’ or ‘make more money’ or ‘feel happy’, that is:

A) unclear,

B) completely uninspired and therefore,

C) completely uninspiring.

So there’s nothing exciting that pulls you forward and makes you want to move mountains.

And then it’s easy to think you need someone to hold you accountable.

But you don’t.

You need to come home to your soul and what YOU TRULY WANT.

Once you find that, you don’t need anyone else to keep you accountable.

You’re unstoppable now!

Although, wait….. There’s also reason #2:

When you GO for that thing you really want, here’s what ALWAYS happens:

ALL your inner shit gets triggered.

Every issue you have with self-worth; your place in the world; if you’re good enough; if people are waiting for you; what they will think of you when you do this or say that; if they want to buy what you sell; visibility; money; and a couple of dozen other doubts & fears that dwell in your system somewhere?

It gets triggered by being in business to begin with.

And if you get the business ball rolling and decide to expand to whatever is next for you?

Oh boy.

The inner shit REALLY hits the fan now!

Having someone hold you accountable, or telling you to stop whining and just DO whatever you should do, DOES NOT WORK AT ALL.

And YOU telling yourself to get over yourself and just GO already does not work either.

Here’s what DOES:

To ADDRESS whatever is causing your inner turmoil.

To heal it, transform it, shift it, change it, transcend it, overcome it, break through it, or whatever you choose to call it.

THAT’S what you need.

If you DO address it, accountability can accelerate your growth. If you DON’T address it, accountability makes you feel worse!

Because on top of not doing what you know you must and want to do, you now also feel guilty towards someone else for not doing it.

And you start wondering what the fuck is wrong with you: why don’t you just DO it, like normal people?

But there’s absolutely nothing wrong with you.

It’s simply that part of you doesn’t WANT to move forward.

Part of you is scared, fears for its life, feels SO uncomfortable that it paralyzes you.

Unhealed pain is coming up so you can see it, heal it, love it, so it can leave you and no longer holds you back.

If there’s something you want that you somehow can’t seem to reach, you don’t need accountability or someone telling you what to do.

You need to go inside, figure out what you want, and what’s stopping you from getting it.

THAT’S what you need.

And if you still want someone to hold you accountable, because when done right, it absolutely CAN help you soar?

Make sure to find someone who KNOWS about transformation, healing, breakthrough and mindset.

Someone who can help you get clear on what you TRULY want AND who knows about inner blocks and how to shift those.

When your inner blocks are released, you’re free to SOAR.

In your own way. In your own pace. Of course. That’s a given 🙂

© Brigitte van Tuijl

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Originally published at on July 28, 2017.




Unfiltered content for women entrepreneurs who want to grow their biz WITHOUT changing who they are or doing things they hate. Loves people - in moderation :)

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Brigitte van Tuijl

Brigitte van Tuijl

Unfiltered content for women entrepreneurs who want to grow their biz WITHOUT changing who they are or doing things they hate. Loves people - in moderation :)

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